Journey For Joy...Happiness Starts Now

Being in Hawaii was a phenomenal experience. I saw so many different people and the culture was nothing like America. People from all over the world like Canada, Japan, and even Australia were in attendance on this beautiful island. Seeing and hearing the waves of the pacific ocean crashing on the beaches was like no other place I’ve been before. On one side of the island is white sand and on other sides the water hits the volcanic rock that created the island millions of years ago. You can stand in one place and look to the left and see the beach, then turn your head to see the lush, green mountains on the other side. The Hawaiian people are so genuine and kind. It reminds me of the southern hospitality you would see in Georgia or Texas, where someone's granny would be quick to offer you some sweet tea. There was no trash to be found anywhere, even the tourists made the effort to throw their trash away correctly and even recycle!

Furthermore I learned so much about Hawaiian history through activities like the tours we did, the surf lessons, or the dope ukulele class we took. The natives really care for their land because they truly believe that they are a part of it. They believe, since the land is all they have they must treat it with respect. Their endless effort to accomplish this was inspiring. Of course my eyes adored the beauty and my stomach enjoyed the food, but I feel truly changed through this experience. No matter if people lived lavishly or they were simple farmers, everyone was happy with the life they had. I would be too if I woke up to a beautiful beach everyday and fell asleep to the sound of waves every night. Throughout my trip, I learned that you can choose to be happy no matter your circumstances(the farmers). You can also be happy while striving to do better for yourself(the high class). Having big dreams can be hard sometimes when all we see are the current circumstances around us. It doesn’t always have to be that way though.

I really enjoy listening to podcasts. Most of them are more about self improvement or motivational in a way. A podcast episode I recently heard was about the very topic of self-acceptance and personal growth. The narrator broke down how we all attach ourselves to the labels we have in life. Thus creating the thoughts we have about ourselves when we don’t live up to these labels. If I’m a manager but my subordinates aren’t following my direction, I would begin to hate my job and ultimately myself because I’m not doing well at this job. If a mother is having troubles with her kids, and her mother gets mad at her, she would then feel worse than she did originally. We attach ourselves to every label in our lives, then wonder why we aren’t happy. The moment we can accept that we merely enact these positions and they don’t define us is the moment we begin to feel better about life more generally.

There is nothing wrong with wanting a better life than you currently have. Most people on this earth feel this same sentiment. Even the person you think has everything, still wants something they don't have. I noticed for myself, that I tend to drown in the goals I set for myself. Correction, I would drown in the expectation of accomplishing these goals. If you’re working towards something you probably think more about how far you have to go than how far you've come. Maybe you have heard the saying that goes, “you shouldn’t look backwards, you're not going that way”. On the road to your dreams, it may help to peek at that rearview mirror. We feel depressed when we spend too much time in the past. However, taking a glimpse every now and then wouldn’t hurt. When you start on your journey, it’s important to know your destination, but you must never forget the bumps in the road along the way. Peeking at that rearview mirror, or reflecting about our past, allows us the ability to see where we hit that pothole(the significant other that hurt us) or swerved to miss that squirrel that ran out in front of us(almost moving in with a friend that secretly dislikes you). But that’s all you do… peek. Then you get back to enjoying the drive, focused on better days. We as humans can get so carried away with the past and the future that we forget about our present blessings. You may not have all the things you want in your life, but you have things now that the past you wanted then.

I’m now practicing extreme gratitude. Knowing I have monstrous goals and working my ass off to make them reality, I take time to enjoy everything today. So many gurus and influencers on social media tell us that we have to give up all the joys of life to achieve greatness. I found myself the most depressed when I followed this model. I would tell myself everyday that the suck is worth it. Missing out on fun times with real friends or barely eating because I didn’t want to spend five dollars on a coffee. This model will certainly bring you to hate life. So I gave that model the middle finger and began to find balance in my current life. You may not always have the funds to go out with your friends to the club or restaurant. Y’all can mix drinks at home, put them in a tumbler and hit the park. Bring some games and y'all can get lit for the low. You might not be able to buy those new Jordans or Doc Martens, but I bet you can thrift some shoes that you like just as much for a fraction of the cost. The journey to your dreams is very important for you will learn things about yourself and life along the way. All making it worth the trial and error it takes.

Gratitude has been linked to better mental health, self-awareness, better relationships, and a sense of fulfillment- Jay Shetty

The pleasure of taking a road trip comes in the joy of playing your favorite tunes, seeing all the sights on the side of the road, and being with your friends laughing til your bellies hurt. Yes your destination wherever it may be is the goal and you certainly want to make it there. Remember the fun doesn’t start when you finally arrive, it starts as soon as you begin your journey.

Shoot for the moon and admire the stars along the way.

-J